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Lifestyle Etiquette

How to behave in the Lifestyle

Even though there are No Strings between people who meet for NSA sex, there are some basic guidelines that will help you get the most from your meetings.

People in the lifestyle in our experience are a pretty well mannered and polite group. There are a few guidelines on how swingers should interact with each other, at the contact stage, the meeting stage, during "play" and after the event.

Manners When Making contact.

If you are responding to an ad

  • Read the profile of potential playmates before you respond.
  • Only respond if you match the stated requirements of the advertiser.
  • Write a short but informative response to the advertiser explaining how you meet their requirements.
  • Send a facial or full length photo with your letter. You are 5 times more likely to get a reply if you have a picture.
  • Do not send a cock or pussy shot unless the advertiser asks for it. Sending one will reduce the chances of getting a positive reply to almost nil.
  • Do not send one line emails along the lines of "I want to fuck you/your wife" again the chance of getting a polite or positive response are almost nil.
  • If you are turned down by the advertiser, do not chase them for reasons, or to beg for another chance. It is the perogative of everyone in the swinging lifestyle to say No to anyone at anytime without having to justify themselves.

When replying to a request to meet.

  • Please answer all messages, even if its just by using the built in "thanks but no thanks" message.
  • Don't be unpleasant when replying, even if the person revolts you. Keep it nice, as swingers talk to each other and will often avoid swingers who treat their friends badly.

If you have arranged to meet someone.

Most of these seem obvious, but we have arranged to meet, and met people who have not done everything in this list.

  • Turn up, or ring the person if you are not going to go to the meeting for any reason.
  • Shower before you go.
  • Clean your teeth.
  • Wear clean clothes.
  • If you get lucky and have sex, take off your socks.
  • Be well presented, appearing in shorts and football jersey is going to turn off all but the most desperate.
  • Buy the couple or girl a drink.
  • Make sure that you give the person you are playing with pleasure. Remember that the people you meet are there for their own fun, and not just to give you pleasure.
  • After you have played, thank the person, or couple. You are far more likely to get a re-visit or be recommended to other swingers if you are nice to the ones you meet.
  • Don`t just run for it, unless the people ask you to leave, stay, clean up, finish your drink, make a bit of small talk and then head on your way, unless you are invited to stay for more.

One guy we played with had his fun, cumming twice, then went to the bathroom, to clean up. He dressed in the bathroom and ran out of the house without saying thanks or good bye. We of course warned every couple and single girl we knew not to bother with him.

After the event

  • Drop the people you have played with a thank you email or message.
  • If you all enjoyed yourselves, ask for another meeting at some point in the future, but do not be demanding, or too persistent.
  • Don`t be upset if the person declines another meeting, for many swinger half the fun is having sex with strangers, and not meeting the same people again.


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